Intermissions

sometimes we make impossible choices
on a mathematical graph version of life
full of boxes to check
and equations to solve
as if it were that easy to pick a path to follow
or a who that will hold our hand along the way

in the dark rooms of decisions
we all just stand staggering alone
images flash like tiny reels of film
that play on the insides of each eyelid
some nights I watch it over and over
rewinding that one scene again
while I pray for the escape hatch of sleep

but instead there is only this breathing caught and tangled
between the web of regret and lies
you know the ones we practice like a valedictorian speech
thanking people we secretly loathe
for making us into some unrecognizable figure
as we tie on the mask and take the final bow

she wrapped a ring around forever
and kissed you hard on the mouth
with tongue turns and teeth marks
left on your bottom lip

you made it mean everything
in a moment parked crooked on the side of the road
a girl trying to erase everything she had broken

she handed over the pen
asked you to write the story of us
twisted her arms into upside-down angles
you saw the misplaced pieces she wished she could be
that she threw back in anger
screaming that you had it all wrong

we had it all wrong

and all along there is that sound
the fuzz and whir of a far off engine
we have all heard it before
the whispers and coos that land at soft parts of our skin
right close to the ear
tricking us into thinking we can run from this

come away and leave the mess behind you, girl

and we have run so hard and fast
that our shoes split in two
our souls breathless and begging for water

but you were not someone she wanted to run to
or away from
but she did run and run and run

all the kisses worked a magic
that slowly bled into the lie
of what we would eventually become
the subsequent error in the formula
the algebraic failure of a broken hearted love