& the vampires roam

building a mystery (album version, video) ~ sarah mclachlan

"you're a beautiful,
a beautiful fucked up man."

the stories continue, whether we choose to write them, or not. i close my eyes to sleep and the characters dance in my head, nudging at me, persistent and unshakeable. i never remember it any different from this - i think i was writing before i knew how to hold a pen.

just like music, and my ability to love, the drive to write has always been with me.

i don't think i'd ever want it any other way.

but i have the sense to recognize

what ravages of spirit
conjured this temptuous rage
created you a monster
broken by the rules of love

and fate has led you through it
you do what you have to do
and fate had let you through it
you do what you have to do

but i have the sense to recognize
that i don't know how
to let you go

every moment marked
with apparitions of your soul
i'm ever swiftly moving
trying to escape this desire

the yearning to be near you
i do what i have to do
the yearning to be near you
i do what i have to do

but i have the sense to recognize
that i don't know how
to let you go

i don't know how
to let you go

a glowing ember
burning hot
burning slow
deep within i'm shaken by the violence
of existing for only you

i know i can't be with you
i do what i have to do
i know i can't be with you
i do what i have to do

and i have the sense to recognize
that i don't know how
to let you go

i don't know how to let you go